One Alternative to Untimely Weaning

When weaning your baby from the breast is gradual and part of the normal progression of the breastfeeding relationship, it can be just one of the many passages mothers and their children share in life, an experience filled with mutual satisfaction, development and emotional growth.

However, far too often, something happens to interfere with the natural establishment or progression of breastfeeding and, as a result, many babies wean much sooner than their mothers expect. Mothers report that this experience is deeply disappointing, even when there is nothing they could have done to prevent it, but especially where the decision was her own.

Sometimes there are situations in which the mum chooses to or is forced to, wean her new baby from the breast onto infant formula. Sometimes, even with 9 months' maternity leave as an option for most people, the return to work can be a reason for this: but it's important to note that even these weaning experiences can and should be planned for and carried out gradually and lovingly, so mother and infant can make the transition without disturbing the close relationship formed during nursing, and to ease physical pressures of weaning on the pair.

Most early weaning, though, is not a happy experience for mother or baby. Often, there are a number of factors causing untimely weaning such as poor breastfeeding information, getting off to a bad start in the hospital, regular use of supplemental bottle feedings, and negative pressure from family, friends or medical professionals: these serve to undermine the mother's confidence or reduce the amount of breast stimulation she receives, and as a result, her milk supply gradually diminishes and, finally, her baby rejects the breast entirely.

The situation is common and until recently there was little one could do after the weaning to help mothers feel better about it. Many Breastfeeding Counsellors report that often women can get tears in their eyes when they confide their disappointment about an untimely weaning experience, even though their children may now be grown.

For an increasing number of women, relactation is becoming an important alternative for coping with untimely weaning. Very simply, "relactation" is either rebuilding a very low milk supply or, in some cases, inducing lactation after it has completely stopped, in order to resume the nursing relationship. Techniques used can involve self-breast stimulation by massage or breast pump and re-teaching the baby to nurse at the breast. It almost always requires supplementing the baby until the supply is re-established.

Relactation isn't for everyone. Sometimes a mother inquires about it because of curiosity, her own guilt feelings or even pressure from others. Before a mother can decide if relactation is for her, she should consider a true analysis of both her and her partner's feelings about breastfeeding. A chat with a Breastfeeding Counsellor locally or via the national helpline can help the mother make a well-informed decision and then to support her in whatever she decides, supporting at all times the bond between the mother and her baby by helping her feel good about her mothering abilities, even if she does not after all resume breastfeeding.

Please see our articles on boosting supply, Charlie's relactation story and Kath's relactation story, for more information.